I think this year is somehow.. difficult for me, even at the last day of the year. It feels like my thoughts, feelings, relationships have been washed out from a hurricane, leaving me a bit of a mess but somehow relieved this year is over soon.
2013 has been a hard year, I suppose. But in a good way..?
I remember times where I felt confused. About why certain things just doesn't add up, and somehow just ends up falling outside my control, or it somehow just blows out of proportion without my understanding. It is difficult, to fix something that you don't know.
I also remember feeling frustrated. How certain plans just don't pan out the way you want to be. Several times, I was so close. I guess this is part of life? I know what I had to give up, and I'm willing to. It's worth it, but alas... maybe they can only happen at the right time.
I also remember telling myself to be strong, to conquer. To deal with many obstacles and heartbreaks. We can be a lot more powerful than we think, as long as we allow ourselves to become.
Of course I had the happier times. But ironically its the sadder ones that we always remember.
I am grateful and wanna give thanks for what I have so far. For a little Fluffy to appear, for my ever loving family, dogs, bf and friends that managed to spend 2013 with me.
I am ready for what's next. I'm scared, but let's go for it.
