Sometimes I think to myself - What is considered enough? When will I ever be good enough? Good enough for who, compared to what?
I guess sometimes the perception of quality of life is inevitably compared with other individuals, even if the basis to it is incomparable, like comparing apples to oranges. Then again it occurs because they have something you want, or admire right at this flickering moment. It's like a vicious cycle, it happens but doesn't stay for long.
I compare. I really do. I compare to all the peers and friends that are in my age; what they are supposed to be doing now and I question myself - Can i keep up? Is it enough? I know that as life branches out in different ways, comparison is futile. You lack an aspect in one, but have more than the other. Of course along the way you doubt your own abilities and what you can do - hence the reason for this post. Doubt. Doubt about everything and nothing. I have to write it all down to structure my thoughts.
In many ways i don't think i am good enough. It may seem negative, but i think having some of this attitude provides humility and act as a catalyst to help fire up more motivation and responsibility, pushing you against your limits.
But i guess there is a tilt to it - too much of it makes you NOT want to self improve, maybe because you think you didn't had it in you in the first place. So why bother? Ironic isn't it.
I don't know what I am feeling or am supposed to feel now in this aspect. It's like a void. I don't want to know, knowing isn't always right. All I want to do is to get rid of this stale feeling and be happy. Now that's something I think I am good at.
